#95 Part 1 Child and Woman
Have you ever felt a moment split your life into a before and an after
even if you couldn’t explain why?
This episode begins not with a conversation, but with a story.
Child and Woman is a piece of creative writing told through myth and image:
a mirror, a locked bathroom door, running water, and a forest that quietly receives what cannot yet be spoken.
Written years before Shame Out Loud existed, this piece lived privately, waiting for the right mix of safety and language. When it finally emerged, it became the foundation for this entire series.
What you’ll hear is not a retelling of events, but an inner landscape.
A girl who cannot stay in the light.
A witness who forms in real time.
A choice to disappear into darkness as a way to survive.
Though spoken in one voice, this story belongs to many. It speaks to silence, protection, disconnection, and the long, often invisible walk back to oneself. The harm itself is not described. What’s named instead is what happens after—inside the body, the breath, the sense of self.
This episode opens a six-part series exploring how shame takes shape, how it’s carried, and how voice slowly returns. The episodes that follow feature roundtable conversations with guests whose lives have been shaped by different forms of harm, instability, and emotional survival
. The details differ. The ache does not.
If you listen, take your time.
Notice what your body does.
Pause if you need to.
This is where Shame Out Loud begins.
And when you’re ready, Part Two is waiting—where Tammy Valasenti and Lori Clarke begin walking the forest together, out loud.
Show Notes
Epi 95: Part 1 Child and Woman
Child and Woman, The Mirror Moment That Starts Shame Out Loud
Brief Episode Summary
Lori Clarke opens the Shame Out Loud series with a spoken creative piece called Child and Woman. She shares why she wrote it years ago, why it took time to feel safe enough to release, and how it became the seed for five more roundtable episodes. The reading names trauma, dissociation, secrecy, and the long return to self, with clear care notes for listeners.
Key Topics Covered
The origin of Child and Woman as the first offering in the Shame Out Loud series
Waiting for “safety in language” before sharing personal creative work
The roundtable format and why guests have different kinds of harm histories
Shame, silence, protection, truth, and how they shape a life
Trauma care notes and content warnings (no graphic details, still tender themes)
The idea of “curious writing companions” (gentle prompts, not homework)
A creative narrative of dissociation, split-self, and survival after violation
The mirror as witness, the forest as darkness, and the path toward return
The moment of recognition between the child and the older woman
What’s next in the series, including Part 2 with co-host Tammy Valasenti
Where to find episodes and writing companions (website and podcast platforms)
Important Quotes and Takeaways (Direct Quotes)
“Child and Woman is the first offering in the Shame Out Loud series.”
“It lived quietly inside of me, waiting for safety and for language that would allow it to be shared.”
“It’s a conversation exploring how shame, silence, protection and truth shape our lives.”
“The details differed, but their ache did not.”
“These are openings. They are not obligations.”
“Please meet yourself with compassion and move at a pace that your body allows.”
“This is creative work, not medical or professional advice.”
“Before the story opened, there was only a girl and a moment that split her world in two.”
“None of this is metaphor. It is a memory.”
“I’d rather go into this darkness than stay in the light of what I just experienced.”
“Thank you for listening to Child and Woman. This piece became the foundation for the Shame Out Loud series.”
Resources Mentioned
Curious Writing Companions (one for each episode, reflective prompts and grounding practices)
Website: www.loriclarkemedia.com
Platforms: Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and “wherever you stream podcasts.”
Support suggestion: “a trained therapist, healthcare provider or someone equipped to support you.”
Guest Information
Host: Lori Clarke
Co-host (mentioned): Tammy Valicenti (joins for Part 2 and the roundtable series)
Other guests (described, not named here): Participants across the series with varied backgrounds, not all S.A survivors, including people from chaotic or alcoholic families, those who were parentified, and those who experienced emotional betrayal or chronic invalidation.
Timestamps for Major Topics
00:14 The series begins, Lori explains this piece was written years ago and held back
00:55 Lori shares the idea of inviting Tammy to co-host roundtables around the piece
01:57 Clear framing of the series themes, why guests’ stories differ but the pain overlaps
04:23 “Curious writing companions,” what they are and how to use them
05:10 Listener care notes, content warnings, and reminder that it’s not professional advice
06:15 Welcome to Shame Out Loud, this episode is the starting point
07:47 The creative reading begins, the split between child and witness
09:22 Generational secrecy, violation, dissociation, and the body’s shock response
11:34 Numbness, ringing, tightening, and dissociation arriving
12:55 Mirror scene, two images, and the first clear split
14:31 “I’m okay,” the body shaking, absorbing what happened
15:40 The path appears behind the reflection, a road into the unknown
16:47 The turning point, “I’d rather go into this darkness…”
18:13 The witness waits, the forest imagery, the girl begins to emerge
20:12 The pool of water, the girl sees a woman in reflection
22:13 Mirrored gestures, the shared scar, recognition
23:22 “It was decades,” the pull to return to the forest, the older voice calls her back
24:51 Wrap-up, how this piece becomes the base for the five roundtable episodes
25:32 Part 2 preview with Tammy Valasenti, “exploring the forest”
26:35 Where to find the writing companions and episodes, closing thanks
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